Photo by Jonathan Klok on Unsplash

I’m reading Eat, Drink, and Be Merry: A Gospel Call to Bold Enjoyment by Ray Ortlund. There’s a lot of good stuff in it, but the thing that jumped out at me this week was this statement: “The Christian journey is not you timidly avoiding sin. It’s you bravely following Jesus — in exactly the ways you were born for.”

Those sentences stopped me in my tracks, and days later, I’m still thinking about them.

I’ve spent a lot of my life focusing on doing the “right” thing and avoiding the “wrong” thing. I’ve even dressed it up in Christianese saying that I’m “avoiding” sin.

A lot of people in the church world have patted me on my back for that – for my whole life.

But that’s the problem. I was living for them, and their praise, rather than for God and His glory.

The reality is, I like to follow the rules because I like control. I want to protect myself from discomfort and disappointment. Sure, I can say that my strictness comes from wanting to avoid sin, but the truth is, it’s driven by fear.

I’m afraid of getting hurt.
I’m afraid of being uncomfortable.
I’m afraid of making a mistake.
I’m afraid of disappointing people I love, or worse, God.

So I stay in my little lane, doing the “right” thing, so afraid that I might sink that I don’t dare to step out onto the water that God is calling me do.

And while none of this is wrong, when we live this way, we’re missing out. We’re missing out on the deep enjoyment God has for us when we let go of our own lives and ideals and trust in Him.

I’ve let fear hold me back from fully living and boldly following Jesus. Maybe you have, too.

But I want to change. And these last few days, as I’ve dug into it more, I’ve realized the beauty and freedom of being brave and letting go.

Nothing earth-shattering has happened. But the fear and anxiety that so often rule my mind are quieter. There’s a new excitement to keep my eyes open to see what God is doing — and what step He’s inviting me to take. And dare I say, there’s a kind of peace. A freedom to delight in the good things that God has given me and an excitement to see where He will lead next. Because that’s the thing. It’s not about me. It’s about Jesus.

I’m now realizing I wasn’t created to avoid doing the wrong thing.
I was created to follow Jesus.

Guess what? You were, too.